It was in ancient Greece that Epictetus perceived that, 'We are disturbed not by events, but by the views we take of them.' (101 Great Philosophers, Madsen Pirie, MJF Books, page 41).
Doing the right thing the wrong way gets the thing accomplished, but leaves an indelible, negative, lasting impression that is not soon forgotten.
The perceived immaturity of another person beckons for the same. If I respond to another's immaturity (ie., their out of order behavior) with immaturity, I then cease to be God in the earth in the moment. The situation then becomes rather worldly, flesh eating flesh, as opposed to iron sharpening iron. It is the Christ in me, the hope of glory, that the other person so desperately needs, as I do myself. It is His glory that should rise within me, rather than some vain response of self-protection, or a worse self-aggrandizement of believing that I know something that I actually do not.
Pride and arrogance believe that they can displace true authority. I have to be completely denied for the true authority to be revealed in a time of response to a less than holy situation. It is no longer I, then, but the Christ living in me that brings reality to fruition. The other person should have the opportunity to be responded to by the Holy Spirit, Himself, even as the archangel Michael, "...in contending with the devil, when he disputed about the body of Moses, dared not bring against him a reviling accusation, but said, 'The Lord rebuke you!'"
(Jude 9). We often tread where angels dare not.
He was oppressed and He was afflicted,
Yet He opened not His mouth;
He was led as a lamb to the slaughter,
And as a sheep before its shearers is silent,
So He opened not His mouth. Isaiah 53:7
This leads us to an errant religious teaching that you simply let people run over you because you think you're acting like Jesus. This is not scriptural. Jesus knew who He was and He walked in that authority. He knew what He had to do and that was to suffer and die on a cross. He did so in obedience. By not opening His mouth, He was essentially saying that He did not worry, complain, murmur, or speak ill of His Father for His Divine purpose. His destiny was to be the atonement for our sin by dying on a cross. That was HIS purpose. Our purpose in Him is wrapped in the swaddling clothes of desiring Him, denying the Self, taking up our cross, and following Him. His purpose was specific and NO ONE else could have, nor could ever perform His particular purpose, it's already done. God had to do it Himself.
If my cross takes me to a place of circumstance wherein my circumstances require me to respond to darkness, I find that I cannot respond on a human level in a godly manner. I can't, but He can. He has proven that. And I have proven that I am humanly incapable of responding from the heavenlies as God, but He can and does. He does the responding through me. I've seen it. I've experienced Him responding to darkness through me in some extremely grave situations.
What a dreadful soul I am if all I have is me to respond to the dark forces in varying opportunities of distress and baited temptation. However, it is the abandonment to the Spirit of God that beckons me to Him, His love will not let me go, nor will it allow me to continue in my self as my self. I am abandoned to Him. It is this denial and the presenting of the true self as a living sacrifice that He makes holy...that He makes righteous...that He lives and moves and breathes and in Him I find Life.
For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother's womb.
I will praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them. (Psalm 139:13-16)
What I am after by continually submitting to Him is for the Divine Nature to be revealed. Paul said, "Therefore since we are the offspring of God, we ought not to think that the Divine Nature is like gold or silver or stone, something shaped by art or man's devising." (Acts 17:29).
You cannot shape God into a cross, or put Him in a box. You cannot act like, or be like Jesus. The Divine Nature is absolute. There is only one God and He must be Himself in me. If I try to act like Him, I fail. I attempt the temptation of usurpation. I am not He. He Is. He Is One. The best that I could be is a miserable substitute; that's what religion is...a miserable substitute.
Religion sets itself up to be an idol unto itself with its own laws and traditions. Religion is a false substitute for the Divine Nature. And if I continue to believe that 'I' can do the work, then my pride will steal the very best that God has for me through my own willful persuasion into an abyss of what does not matter.
The church, too, is in all things tried and has fallen short from the Truth. It is, perhaps, why the description of a 'hate' crime has been created as it has today because, over a period of many years, the world's view of the church's love is that of hate from the church's response being so despicable towards other humans.
Will I follow the legions of men who have gone before me and proclaimed the cross of Christ through a vessel of hate, or will I be True to the Truth that I know to be True in me?